SYEEQA nurul SYAFIQAH

NO MORE HERE.

2009-08-08T10:39:00.001-07:00

IVE MOVED TO WWW.POTRAYAL-OF-LIFE.BLOGSPOT.COM.
LINK ME UP :)
THANK YOU.

NEW journey.

2009-04-16T07:28:00.000-07:00

tired.
yeah, im tired, superb tired.
days passed.
day 1's orientation was orite. ( i left half way for my star course.)
and yeah, luckily, i checked my answers for the test.
im SO CARELESS. a for c. c for a. i circled all the wrong answers due to my sleepy condition. lols.
pls. pls. pls.
pls let me pass my test.
PRAY FOR ME ORITE?
i want to pass. :)

day 2 orientation.
tats today.
tiring.
games and shouting.
too much of walking arnd.
im damn urban tired.
and yesh, im down with fever and flu.
irritating!!!

and afta sch.
...
someone,
thank u. thats an awesome trip.
and ride. but pls, ride safely.
but most imptly,
THANKIU SO MUCH FOR
making my tireness all gone.
making me laugh like no one business.
i guess, i do mis you.
GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN.
end of it.
lols.

can i not go for tmr orientation.
pls? im sick.
but tmr theyll teach me how to use the connections and watsoever for lessons.
and its impt.
i wish it's postpone, but nvm, i shud just go.
i miss working alr.
ADAPT to it, syeeqa.
:)

thoughts for myself.
qamarul arifin.
i mis those times with u.
i knew many times, u asked for me back.
im so dumb aint it?
all i ever do is to find ur mistakes.
i left you for a guy tat had hurt me so many times.
im blinded by love.
keep makin my heart so soft, makin myself miserable by forgivin him
and givin him chances when all he did all d time, was to let me down.
while u r the one, backin me up evrytime.
i did mistakes to u, but never did once u brought it up.
u oways initiated tat we opened up a new chapter.
im the one who refuses.
ALL THE TIME.
im so stupid.
damn, i am.
u trusted me, u didnt caged me.
u were faithful to me.
yet, i left u,
what the hel is wrong with me?
u knew i was tinkin so much, i was amazed u knew.
ure so perfect.
damn, im stupid.
im lost.
im hangin on to something that im unsure whether i reali want it or not.
:l.

rushing. rushing. rushing.

2009-04-12T08:26:00.001-07:00

time is passing by so fast. 2 more days.
and here comes, my sch's orientation.
im SO NOT READY.
not ready for everything.
`15 april 2009.
from 9am to 5pm in sch at wdlands.
and 7pm to 9+pm at kallang for my course.
can i make it on time?

`16 april 2009.
9am-5pm in sch AGAIN.

`17 april 2009.
the "BEST" thing ever.
9am to 9pm.
(why sia so long?)

IM SO NOT READYYYYYYYYYYY.

IM PATHETICALLY NOT READY FOR THIS.
EVERYTHING IS SUCH A RUSH.
I NEED TIME.
AND YES, IM AFRAID I ILL LET PEOPLE DOWN.
MY HEAD TELLIN ME I CANT DO IT.
I CANT. I CANT. I CANT.
ITS SO BAD.
MY CONFIDENCE IS GETTIN LOW.
IT DROPPED again.
baby, im scared.
he says i haf a heart of a fighter thou im small size.
i have a spirit of taking in challenges.
people noe i can do it.
the only opponent i got to defeat is e voice in my head tellin me i cant do it.
but still, im scared.
baby, u wil not leave me ryt?
u promise me to be with me goin thru all dis.
im so glad. im relieved.
ilysm. :)

tok. tok till uve no more to tok about.

2009-04-05T07:29:00.000-07:00

for the whole day, ive been rottin at home.
ZzZzZz. im on tight budget.
so many stufs to get before sch opens.
so yeah, im learning to save for all that.
proper clothes.
proper shoes.
sch bag.
laptop's case.
shud be thats it.
and yeah, theres bill to pay. :)

one of my ex boyfy passed thru yanah's blog today.
msged me up asking me if i know yanah.
him: b, eu tawu sape2 namer mary. ( mary is yanah's nick)
me: huh? mary ape. ane la i ade kwn name mary.
him: mary. emo2 nye bdk. i tekan name eu pat google. kuar la blog dier. and mcm tentang eu je die berboal b. name laky eu fahyyaz pe.
me: pat dunia ni kan byk namer syeeqa and fahyyaz. bkn me dgn my boyfy je kan.
him: yela. eu nk typu tk masok akal. lau eu tk nk share tk pe. tapi i tk suke ahh die boal sal u gyni mcm. i tk uat pape sampai i da pastkan die berboal sal eu k. lau ye eu, i nk sound gyni.

" lau k0 nk b0al sal pomp0an aku jage, aku syg, ko cube cermin diri ko dulu ehy pompuan. lawa tidak, perangai haprak. ko jaoh beza dgn syeeqa k. ko nk mengate, ley, tapi ngate sal laki die. laki die yg uat hal dgn ko. aku pun tkde hal lao ko nak laki die, aku bahgia dpt syeeqa balek. "

me: lau btol die boal sal me, let her be la. i da mls ah. i totali penat. and yesh, im not ur girl. im attached. i haf a boyfy eh u. so yah. pls mind ur words eh boyy.

lols.
im quite pissed in fact.
but managed to calm down.
i dont bother anymore what she wants to say bout me.
her sins. not mine.
and yeah, ive nth to bear against her.
so many other things to tink bout.
maybe one day, she'll get tired toking bout me.
again, for boyfy's past mistakes,
im payin the consequences.
so unfair.
ok, lets stop dis topic.

tmr working. :)
and afta that, goin to aljunied for an interviu.
and home sweet home after that.

So So So TIRED!

2009-04-04T06:56:00.000-07:00

Im pretty tired.
so so so so so tired.
cudnt sleep well for days.
and my eye bags, gettin worse.
today, yeah.
a stressful day.
did cashier, lots of shortage, lots of runaway customer.
kurangasam tol.
in the end, shortage of $8.
ok, good. atleast i can afford.
what say you if its, $30+?
im alrdy so broke right now. oh, pls dont make me even broke. :)
felt so bad indeed, make erwin headache bout the shortage or watsoeva.
but seriously, just now was so hectic ah.
why must those bills and takeaways came at the same time??
was there no other good time for it to come separately.
but nvm, i manage somehow to get over it.
take it as a lesson learnt. :)
a lesson is more expensive or even, priceless than the $8 i have to pay.
thanks to those who guide me all along, aqmar, uncle ong, aaron and erwin.
appreciate it lots, really.
and lava for make me feelin better.
lols. "everyone make mistakes, if not, they arent human beings. they are someting else."
and yesh, thanks to boyfy for willing to come up to send me $4 so tat i dont nid to go atm to just for it.
it wasnt that bad, finally.
its a lesson learnt and an experience gain at the end of the day. :)

after work, had dinner with boyfy.
and proceed home.
yeah, thats all for today.
time for my beautiful sleep. :)

You're NOT sorry, i guessed.

2009-04-02T09:34:00.000-07:00

Ive been mia for a very long period, i know.
People complain that my blog is dead, i know.
Hehes. Im sorry, dear darlings who bother to come across my blog.
:)

yes, ive graduated from ite bishan, higher nitec in accounting.
i managed to finish it okayy. :)
started off with a gpa of 3.313333..
ended off with a gpa of 2.6666666..
it dropped, but not that terokk whatt.
next destination of mine, republic polytechnic.
and the course is, sports and leisure management.
those who are reading this, BETTER DONT LAUGH OKAYY.
i hate presentations so much but i will adapt to it.
ill give my best.
my parents work hard to get me tru dis, im not gona let them down.
3 yrs, and done with a diploma.

i have my psle cert, o lvl cert, higher nitec accounting cert.. and here i come, for a diploma. what i realise about my life is that, ive oways learnin tings on my own, thru the hard way.
ive never follow the straight path, i go round and round, turn right, then left and i reach my destination. thru out dis journey of mine, no one support me. no one motivate me. my secondary school teacher wrote tis in my testimonial and reports.

From leaving certificate of secondary sch:
"Syafiqah is a highly responsible and self-motivated person. She expects the best from herself yet she remain humble when achieves it in various spheres."

From testimonial (dis one is funny!!):
"Syafiqah is a person who is full of positive qualities, a PERSON ANYONE WOULD BE HAPPY TO WORK WITH." (it sounds as if im a joker. lols.)

i never say all of it is true, some parts only ah. hehes.

so, yeah. conclusion is, though im not so into my course, i will give my best to it. PROMISE. no skippin sch, no latecomings. :)

NEXT.
i did work just now.
it was so busy. didnt feel like thursday.
felt like.. friday nite??
i wonder how it will be today then.
but thank god, i have my dearest darling workin with me today.
so, the nite was just fine and fun.
and i have my two best bussers. LAVA AND KAI.
(ringan sikit beban aku. phewwww.) lols. funny bussers.
looking forward to work with these bunch of people again.
aqmar, ina, nel, nani.. and all. :)

NEXT.
ive read yanah's ( fahyyaz's godsys who go crazy for him. )

babe,
it is wronged of me to push all the blame to u, gettin closer to my boyfy. he is at wrong too as he gives hope to u, make u reali need him in ur life. both of u are at fault. and me too, as i came in the middle of you guys, not knowin what the real story was. but try puttin urself in my shoes. what wud you feel, what wud you do? i trusted the both of you in first place, but the both of you betrayed me. he was all the times there for you, me? his own girlfriend, he put me aside. ive been keeping quiet. you haf ur boyfy too, why dont you look for him? you wrote you needed attention. let me tell u someting, my life is more disastrous than yours, yet i need no one to get out of my shits. my family and my true friends are all i ever nid thou they arent there all the time. they are the reasons why im stil living. you haf ur a happy family, you haf ur friends. my family used to be broken in the past, a mess. urs? a happy one. so what are you lacking of in life? u just choose to be miserable. ure sitin for ur o lvl dis yr, wake up my dear girl. u haf to start focusin on it, unless you want your life to be like mine. fahyyaz is just a boy, hes not a men yet. he cant take care of you forever. yes, for the state that ure in right now, he is to partly to blamed. he shud apologise. but rmmber dis, YOUR LIFE IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. u take control of it, not muhd fahyyaz. overall, let me tell you this, dont curse fahyyaz. stop being pathetic. wake upppp from ur emo world. and yes, i dont force fahyyaz to be with me. he chose to be with me. if at any times, he wants to go with u. ill be most willing to let him go. mark my words, i wil not regret letting him go if he choose to be with you cos atlest, im clear how he fils toward me and i dont waste my lyf period on him. :)

to my dear boyfy,
b. listen. u are also fault. and yes, i dont force u to be with me. so if u want to be with me, respect me, treat me right. if not, dun waste my time. u can choose to be her. im happier if u make ur choice clear. :). if its her, go ahead. make it clear so i know how u fil towards me, and us. my lyf's journey maybe be short, maybe stil a long way. but what i noe, i dun wish to waste any more of my life period, suffering for a guy. its not worth at all. i deserve to be happy. and evry right to be happy. so, get this clear. if u choose me, tis is the last straw for you. after this, dun bother to beg for anyting anymore from me. ive given too many chances, and what you do is to let me down. heres the song for you, "youre not sorry." by taylor swift. ive made my stand clear. love you, bby. :)

im simply crazy over that song.
lols.
:) til here for today.